I’m not the kind of person who goes to the gym. Or works out. Or jogs. If I’m going to be active there has to be a very good reason. Like fun.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m an ex-jock. A serious soccer, lettered-in-college, ex-jock. But I’m not goint to run my ass around the block just to run my ass around the block. When I move I want to score fucking goals!

Except that I hate team sports anymore. And I spend 9 hours a day sitting on my ass in front of a computer so some activity is required. The GFs boss mentioned (okay, actively recruited is the correct phrase here) that the head of the local fencing club is the former coach of the Egyptian Olympic team and I was sold. Active (I couldn’t walk for 2 days after the first lesson)! Olympic! And I get to hit people! Also, since I’m one of the only people fencing who was actually athletic to begin with, I’m already jumping ahead to intermediate classes and fencing the ranked fencers.

Only, no one told me that geeks own this sport. I don’t know why it never occurred to me, but it is so true. Once again, I gravitated naturally to the geekiest thing available. I guess I should lay down my cool hat and just face facts: I read physics for fun; I visit BoingBoing.net several times a day; and several of my favorite books/stories fall in the fabulist pen. And now I fence. I’m one milady away from a Renaissance Fair. No matter how many indie angst songs I (co-)write, I will never be able to fill the gaping geek hole in the center of my personality. Or is it the other way around? Is the cool the gaping hole in my soul? Hmmmmm.

But cool costumes. Er…uniforms. If you like looking like a fighting chef in a beekeeper’s mask. And I’m covered in bruises. Did I mention you get to hit people with swords/foils?